Musical Furniture

Tshepo Mokoena

Wouldn’t it be awesome if musical chairs wasn’t just that childhood game none of us have played in years? As in, if there really were musical bits of furniture that you could play like instruments? We’ve got everything from bendy guitar tables to an organ that also just so happens to be a desk. 

Just in case the surrealist land of Dali-esque furniture hadn’t already crossed your mind, a certain Phil Daniels has decided to make those fantasies a reality. And while that may sound a lot more erotic than these bent guitar tables really are, there’s still something as vaguely creepy about them as there is about most sexual fantasies. He essentially recreates the bodies of popular guitars as weird bent-over tables, with the necks and two attached table legs supporting the overall body.

Apparently it took him over two years to develop this idea, from tinkering with a Gibson Les Paul to launching his other models. Now you can get up to seven different varieties, so there are really no excuses for not owning one of his custom-built, lacquered home accessories. Well, besides personal taste.

If you’re leaning more towards something percussive, these ten-note drums from Boxed Music Drums should be enough to whet your appetite. They’re like a marimba-piano-conga hybrid, with each note accented by a specific cavity beneath the table canopy to produce the music you’d imagine soundtracks the dreams of a guy who just wants to go trekking in the Himalayas until he finds himself again. Known as the Songa, their drums are made in a variety of woods and finishes to give off different sounds. It’s probably a pretty nifty dinner party tool, though I am concerned that they’ve named “Africa” and “South America” as ‘countries’ of origin for their wood. That’s a bit of a worrying lack of research, eh?

For those who’d rather pound away on some keys, there’s a sweet compromise to be found in Kagen Schaefer’sorgan desk. This one genuinely seems awesome, since it not only plays tunes but has an internal memory (aka a pneumatic logic board – an airpowered computer) used to store a history of them. And why’s that? Because if you play notes in the right order, it can unlock secret compartments in the huge desk and lead you on a sort of musical treasure hunt. It’s made completely of wood, with notes played when drawers are closed and air passes over organ pipes at the front of the desk; in short, it’s like a huge toy that you can be creative with and also store papers in like a grown-up. Yes.

Finally we’ve got this Ouija board table from Nick Holcomb. He’s been customising and pulling apart guitars since he was a teenager so be probably just comes up with stuff like this in his sleep now. With his companyHolcomb Guitars, he’s designed a slide guitar that can stand on its two legs while being played. No, we wouldn’t suggest keeping your coffee on it but maybe it could be used to store some sheet music or something. Yeah, stick to dry things for this one. If it all gets too complex, just relive the joys of playing xylophone as a child and invest in one of Tor Clausen’s Musical Furnishings tables, chests or benches. I reckon I can still bash out ‘She Loves You’, you know.

 

Originally published on Don’t Panic UK